If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Banned from zoo.
Again?
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
