I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
from now on my penis is your penis
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Randomize
