no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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