I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
they call him Oral-B. enough said
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
