Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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