The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
