Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
