Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I*** M*****, this is your dignity texting you. I ditched you when you started hitting on bros and old sailor men last night. My friend Sarah has pictures to prove it.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize