u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
