At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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