I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Randomize
