M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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