he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
