i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Randomize
