You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Randomize
