I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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