Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
