I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize