I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Damn victory sex feels great
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
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