My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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