Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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