The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
