So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Im part way to drunk.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Randomize
