He uses pillows to masturbate.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
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