Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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