can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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