chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Randomize
