So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Randomize
