so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
