One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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