you guys were way drunker than both of me
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Randomize
