I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
false alarm. still invincible.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
