so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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