found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
The air taste purple.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
