remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
