party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
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