yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
