Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
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