I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Randomize