Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
