How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Randomize
