everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
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wow
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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