Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
