she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
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