Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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