Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
