So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
