google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
