ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize