I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
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