She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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