Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Randomize
