That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
My liver just had a heart attack.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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