sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Randomize
